Orange and Black Pack

Bryzgalov Tells the Muckraking Vultures How “Embarrassing” They Are

Ilya_Bryzgalov Pissed at Reporters

I have to give a lot of credit to Ilya Bryzgalov; through the past two days, to no one’s surprise, the Flyers media has manufactured and spread a rumor about Bryz falling asleep during a team meeting. Because he’s one of the easiest professional athletes to speculate on, the rest of North America’s hockey journalism ran with the story like it was OJ Simpson in his fucking white Bronco.

Of course, that’s not the worst of it all; what’s exacerbated the matter has been all the underling fans who’ve bought into these headlines. If the Flyers beat writers had any value at all, it is their uncanny ability to expose the weak-minded sheep in our fanbase. 

But once the media has converted a mass of imbecilic zombies, they’ll never let the subject die. So, to no one’s surprise, after last night’s 3 – 1 loss to Ottawa, one of the members of this half-ass journalist guild decided to bring up the “sleeping” rumor in an interview with Bryzgalov. 

Our franchise netminder dropped a dose of reality on these cretins –

You can see Sam Carchidi and Tim Pannacio — two culprits of this rumor’s creation — furiously recording every word Bryz had to say. Not once did I ever get the idea that either of these two magpies were actually LISTENING to what Bryzgalov had to say; I figure the both of them, and their media comrades, were just hanging on every piece of Ilya’s broken English, just waiting for the right sentence to inflate and blast out of context.

I started out this article saying I give Bryzgalov a lot of credit. That’s true, I do. I may not be the biggest #30 fan in the orange and black bunch, but if I were Bryzgalov….. the interview would not have gone so politely. 

On top of a string of obscenities I’d roar into their faces, I’m pretty sure I would have bulldozed my game-worn jockstrap down one of those mother f*cker’s throat.
Then tell him to, “sleep it off.”